The stress of the last week has been pretty intense. On Thursday evening, at 11:15, I sent an update email to my students’ parents. I worked non-stop trying to get teaching online up and running. By Friday morning, I really needed a break.
So while I checked in with my students during the day, I did a lot less work than the rest of the week. And most importantly, I went for a walk.
The moment my feet hit the road, I noticed that my chest was super tight and my shoulders were up by my ears. As I walked, I consiously tried to release that tension. And by the time I arrived at the lake, I felt more relaxed. My mind wasn’t racing. I could hear the birds and enjoy the crisp March air. I stopped at the lake for a while and enjoyed the fog rising before I turned around to head back home, feeling significantly more at peace already.
As I was walking, I was reminded of my daily walks after X left. Before he left, it had been such a struggle to even get myself to go on a walk. Part of that was due to the physical complications I had from my pregnancy and miscarriage – walking was a bit painful. But that pain had subsided quite a bit just before he left. At that point, I just had all I could do to get out of bed every day and go to work. But when he left, I felt such anxiety that I literally HAD to move.
The walks helped then, and they are going to help me now. With this COVID isolation, I’m going to be completely alone, save for some kitty snuggles. It’s going to be hard not to numb out, not to get off schedule with my sleep, not to overeat. When I’m struggling, just as I did when X first left, I’m going to take a walk!