Saying Goodbye

This morning I said goodbye to my bestest buddy, my sweetest dog, Moose. He was simply the most wonderful dog anyone could ask for.

He loved to snuggle.

He loved going for walks.

I think he loved the anticipation of a walk almost as much as the walk itself!

The head tilt when asked, “Do you want to go for a walk?”

He loved his toys and gentle playing with them.

He even loved the cats.

Moose was the reason I made it through each day after X left me. I would bribe him to jump into bed with treats (he usually didn’t like being on the bed). Then he would stay and snuggle for a long time, until he overheated. He knew I needed the snuggles. And so did he.

When X returned to get his shit, Moose would greet him and get excited, then realize he wasn’t staying and come right over and sit at my side. He was so loyal to me. He was happy to see me when I got home and greeted me each morning on the side of the bed.

We’d take long walks together. Together we got stronger. It was so important for me to have him to take care of. I had to walk him every day. I was his person now. There was no one else. I’d say to him, “I’ve got your back, Jack!”

X was the one who always played games with him. When I would try to play, he just didn’t get too excited. So I found a dvd of fun training games to build a close relationship with your dog. I bought it and started playing them with him. They were so much fun! They were our games and he really loved them. We’d even play them out on our walks!

I’m so heartbroken for the loss of the future I had planned for us. Walks on the beach and in the NH woods. An electric fence so he could roam the yard freely. Fun times visiting my parents. I can’t believe I don’t get to do that with him.

As he was dying this morning, he was very disoriented and distressed. All he wanted was to be in my lap. He crawled in, too big to fit, and just stayed as I held him. I’m so grateful that I could be there for him in his time of need and I hope he knows just how very much I love him. Rest in Peace, now, my sweet sweet puppers. The house feels so empty without you.